Here is a special treat I developed for my blog, Ramblings of an Undiscliplined Mind, that I dropped into the feed for your enjoyment.


Ahoy, me hearties! It be Talk Like A Pirate Day, and I hope yer doin’ me proud. In celebration o’ the day, I answer some letters from people with questions o’ how best to celebrate TLAPD. Arrr, I hope ye enjoy it!

Captain Gizmo

Use the player below or download it here.

Run time: 5:40


Dear Captain Gizmo,

I’m really excited about Talk Like A Pirate Day, and want to make sure I’m outfitted right. I got some of that glitter makeup so I can sparkle in the sun, but I’m not sure how much to use. How much do pirates sparkle in the sun?


Sporks, Maine


Hiya Cap’n Gizmo!

I think I’m all ready for Talk Like A Pirate Day this year! I’ve got my wand, and some of that makeup for the scar on my forehead. I’m also planning on wearing my bathrobe. Is there anything I forgot?

Pigmoles, England


Mr. Gizmo,

This year will be the best Pirate’s Day ever! I’ve got my black outfit, katana sword, and shurikens ready. How do you learn to throw those things on a moving ship? I tried practicing in my living room and almost hit my cat! Any help would be appreciated.

Nina Jay
Rio Linda, CA


Mammalian Greetings!

I am really excited for this year’s Walk Like a Primate Day. This year I want to walk like a chimpanzee, but I just end up looking like a bad extra from Planet of the Apes. Do you have any pointers?

Somewhere in New York


  1. Captain Gizmo,

    What kind of scurvy dogs do ye hang out with? Those scum-swillin' land-lubbers that wrote to ye this year could find a clue if it was buried under a giant 'X' on a map. Great job dispatching them with your sharp wit and not-so-shart cutlass. Until next year.

    First Mate Gary

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